Calling it a No-Go NaPoWriMo

I gave it a good shot, at the very end.


I thought I'd try to beat the clock and churn out some quick poems. And I did. But not enough. Because - well, work.


And that's okay.


It's good to fail once in a while!


And this failure is fine and maybe I should find another word, rather than "fail." Or maybe it's good for me to experience failure and know that I won't die. Seriously. Sometimes my body has its own anxious reaction to failure and it thinks we're going to die - not just failure, other things. Body memories; "high functioning anxiety;" there may be other labels. but I'm fine. Really.


I failed! Go, me!


Okay - here are the poems I didn't write this April:


NaPoWriMo #26
NaPoWriMo #27
NaPoWriMo #28
NaPoWriMo #29
NaPoWriMo #30

NaPoWriMo #25

wander
by ds hearn




with speed thoughts pass unbidden
working across time zones splitting
hairs or lack of inspiration
in this voice void of time
without time
stuck in time
not my own

NaPoWriMo #24

in the cube 
by ds hearn




your voice too loud
your words break tears in my ears
my teeth grate try to smile
ignore the staccato of irritation
building as i try
to ignore the beating
words on words in my head
can't hear myself think
think
breath
think
extravagant luxurious hot tubs
take me away
i can't
i'm working
words of exasperation i can't say
words
work
breath
tick silent clock tock
tick breath
tock beat
word
falls
breath
sigh

NaPoWriMo #23

saturday morning without clouds
by ds hearn




sun brings lawn mowers
waking to birds laughter heat
cars being washed steam

NaPoWriMo #22

before coffee when the cat still sleeps
by ds hearn




there is a moment
when her green eyes open. blink.
soul shines heart beats. blink.

NaPoWriMo #21

determination or stubbornness
by dshearn




and yet she persists
(me) against the odds i try
counting down minutes

NaPoWriMo #20

finger on the button of nuclear annihilation
ds hearn


one hundred days. breathe.
one hundred and one days. out.
one day more. heartbeat.

NaPoWriMo #19

when you say you have something for me but you only want blood
ds hearn


aggitation screams
floating on a cloud like tears
your voice in my head

NaPoWriMo #18

imperfection
ds hearn


sometimes you just have to accept
that you aren't super woman
or not their version of super woman
because
you can't do it all
by their standards their expectations
their
lists of what you should do


only maybe I am my own kind
of super woman
maybe i am fine
and maybe i have to admit to myself
that i can't do
everything


and sometimes


i fail


like in writing 30 poems in 30 days

NaPoWriMo #17

After "Spiritrial" His Rhythm in My Body, His Words Still Echo
DS Hearn

Coming into this space from the space of the work
the work of another on being in his body
in his body and subject to color blind obviously not
a body held and controlled or attempt to control
but the heart and the mind say
no
color of his skin determines impressions
from outside
assumptions of intent or possible action not depedent
on reality because they are not
color blind
heat of a truth in his body in his words
his activism born of survival being pushed down
being pushed away being swung by the gut
being in the moment when trickling spiritual senses
smile pull him in when survival says
smile and be the good one
no
be good and be true
his truth
speak it

NaPoWriMo #16

I'm so far behind that calling each poem "day #xx" seems silly.

So I'll just number them

It's the last day of NaPoWriMo and I'm only halfway there.


Lives in my Body
DS Hearn

I'm learning about my body
words written in my body no words on my body
silent scars tears adhesions steeled for more
everlasting trauma infused in my dna or is it
move it through breathe it through
write it out
sticky
may not be
eradicated
but sticky
is only part of the story

NaPoWriMo Day 15 2017

haiku


from here to there is paved with closed roads and protests
ds hearn

hi ho hi ho off
to work i go busy
streets require change
*

NaPoWriMo Day 14 2017

Another etheree for the month. New, raw, writing.


because the real world is overwhelming
ds hearn

un
icorn
frappaci
no color chang
ing taste alternat
ing drink laden with fat
sugar sodium sprinkles
adults have to have it want mem
ory magic fairy dust blue tongue
sweet to tart imagination. escape
*

NaPoWriMo Day 13 2017

*
Cinquain
"This form still consists of five lines, but now has a specific syllable count starting with a two syllable line, and followed by three lines which increase by two syllables each time and the final line reverting to a two syllable line again."



politics on my mind
DS Hearn


resist
pay attention
lies and obfuscation
perpetuating hate, dis-ease
reach pull
*

NaPoWriMo Day 12 2017

*
This is a tanka poem. The history of tanka and the overview of the form.


the world swirls and we come together
DS Hearn


ire of the women
stillness not necessary
words swallowed hearts beat
trees on the wind empowered
swim in the ocean. life source
*

NaPoWriMo Day 11 2017

*
But on day 16 because I'm super late and super behind.


Failed Attempt at Rhyme
DS Hearn

I should write a limerick
Then jump, or skip, or kick
Cuz words will fail me so
I'll sit, relax now go go go
Look, my poetry is dancing on a stick.
*

NaPoWriMo Day 10 2017

*
Upside Down
DS Hearn


If I could tell you
That everything is okay
Would you believe me?
*

NaPoWriMo Day 9 2017

*
Re-Entry
DS Hearn


words of your words mine
echoing circling forward
enter my dream. breathe
*

NaPoWriMo Day 8 2017

*
The Stories We Are Told Are Not Us
DS Hearn


the words we bring are
not the entirety of
our being. blood flows
*

NaPoWriMo Day 7 2017

*
Arriving at Re-Vision
DS Hearn


velvet chairs hearken
nostrils awakened by fire
hearts enter the room
*

NaPoWriMo Day 6 2017

Haiku 

*

Tears and Outrage at Building the War We Don't Want

DS Hearn

leveling players

field in state of overgrown

retaliation

*

NaPoWriMo Day 5 2017

*
Today, haiku.

*

Friendship After an Absence

DS Hearn

hazel eyes downcast

painted toes reach enter sand

whispers, where have you been?

*

NaPoWriMo Day 4 2017

Another etheree for the month. New, raw, writing.


*
Writing to Fill Abandoned Spaces
DS Hearn


pen
often
words scrambling
meaning evades
blank paper daring
bold emergence pink eyes
which cannot be contained stare
indication of innocence
forgiveness repealed autonomy
taken turned back into blatant revolt
*

NaPoWriMo Day 3 2017

Another etheree for the month. New, raw, writing.



Sound at the Window
by DS Hearn

yes
today
i woke up
shook off the dream
which shook my places
never touched never seen
yet i remember their scent
landscapes of imagination
painted with indiscriminate signs
to heart destinations erased by doubts


*

NaPoWriMo Day 2 2017

*
Wanting to be Heard
by DS Hearn

Belly full days round
up inside letters signaling innocence
signaling the end of ignorance signaling
life in the dark of night plays
with unknown sleeping strangers
days of sun gone into rain waters
rise
rise
like the lap against the old sea wall
water in motion
we
lap
rise
lap
rise
full sense alive
until tomorrow
maybe beyond
rise

tomorrow
we will
sleep
*

NaPoWriMo Day 1 2017

I would like to do more writing at this time. More new generative writing. But I am deep in editing my current project and new material, especially something as involved as Camp NaNoWriMo or such, is not going to happen.


But, I decided I would try to write a poem a day. I haven't written poems for a while so these will be rough. They are raw. They will also be short and I am planning to do structured poems.


Here is my first one:


An Etheree, untitled.
DS Hearn

sky

peeks through

gray clouds and

sunken rainbows

on the edges with 

black birds in flight above

trees, houses, in dreamscapes soar

memories filling gaps and drains

energy from autopilot dust

sleep waits in the shadows quiet as ice.
.